You might be a saver but your spouse is a spender, and you want to know how to save money. You love your spouse, and this alone isn't enough to make you walk away, but I'm sure you have already had quite a few arguments with you are reading this. So now what?
A Spender and a Saver Fell in Love… Now What? How to Save Money
Understand. First you need to understand each other, sit down and find out why your spouse spends money and explain why you are a saver. If you came from a family where you saved money and rarely spent it on anything other than necessities it's been engrained in you and you, need to tell your spouse that. What if your family never had any more and that savings is a safety net for you? Tell them. The fewer secrets between you, the stronger your marriage. Make sure to listen to them first. Maybe they never had anyone to explain budgeting and saving for them. Maybe they were deprived of so much as a child they indulge now.
Whatever your reasons are, understanding each other goes a long way but won't FIX the problem.
Manage the Budget Together. Make sure you are managing the budget together. While it's probably a better idea for the saver of the marriage to do the budgeting and bill paying the spender should be included. I wrote about how 10 minutes a week with my husband saves us $100 or more. It's a good read for this reason. It is never a good idea to keep secrets are keep money hidden from the other person, this will cause more problems then you know so don't so it.
Talk about it. Listen to what the spender wants to buy, a vacation, an item for the house, etc. and listen to WHY. then talk about how long it would take to save up the money for it and ask them if it's that important. If they want to save up for it, then do it, my guess unless it's really is important they will forget you are saving for it or move on to something else.
Allowance. Give each person an allowance. This will allow the spender to spend it how she wants. Don't get upset if they blow it the first few days or save it up for something else. Once it's gone, it's gone, and that needs to be a strong rule.
Give a little. When you plan to redecorate the house, let the saver set the budget and let the spender do the shopping. Planning a vacation? Set a budget and let the spender plan it, I bet the vacation is amazing!
The most important thing is to make sure you don't try to change the other person. They will change if THEY want but don't expect it, remember you fell in love with them just the way they are.
I 100% agree with the Allowance idea. It’s like releasing steam from a steam engine. If the spender never gets to spend, his or her eventual explosions are called spending sprees… and they usually involve credit cards or store credit.
Thanks for the post!